B.J. Neblett wrote, “We are the sum total of our experiences. Those experiences – be they positive or negative – make us the person we are.” It would be easy for me to simply tell you that I am a dynamic speaker, a success coach, an uplifting author, and/or a community influencer. While those statements are true, those statements do not paint the picture of who I am, what trials I have overcome, what challenges I have faced, and what I have experienced in my journey. My life’s calling is to elevate your life – personally, professionally, relationally – through speaking, coaching, consulting, and modeling. I am not someone who found their calling right away; it took decades for me to pinpoint my specific purpose for living.
People may look over my profile, noting my experience as a motivational speaker over the last seventeen years – connecting with a variety of audiences spanning the corporate world, prison, non-profit organizations, churches, conferences, elementary age children, middle school students, high school students, college students, single professionals, and married professionals – and conclude I have easily identified my gifts. This just isn’t true.
Once you know my story, every part of my purpose becomes clear. I help marriages because I’ve lived the pain of divorce through my parents but I’ve also tasted the radiance of marriage; I help relationships because I’ve made countless mistakes with others but I’ve also made lifelong bonds that transcend any demographic; I help people in their profession because I know the drain of a dead-end job but also the fulfillment of discovering my unique calling; I help people establish vision and accomplish their goals because I know the emptiness of an aimless life but also the thrill of seeing my hopes and dreams actualized; I help people achieve and succeed because I know both loss and victory; I help people endure and persevere because I learned strategies to overcome my own trials; I help people connect with the power of change because I know the frustration of feeling stuck but also the beauty of transformation.
If you know my experience, you know me. My name is Derek Daniel Guajardo and this is my story.
Early Pain and a Single Parent Household (1985-1993)
In 1985, I was born in San Antonio, TX. One of my earliest – and most painful memories – is when my Mom and Dad divorced when I was two years old in 1987. Many times I have reflected on that incident, striving to comprehend what led to such a decision. Why would my Dad not want to live with his incredible wife and precious three children – my older sister Diamond, my younger brother Jared, and me? For me as a child, it was difficult to fathom. Early on, I decided that I would be different from my Dad: I would learn from his shortcomings; if I ever had children, I would not put my children through the experience I had.
By the year 1988, my Mom moved us to a house on the southeast side of San Antonio. We did not have a much as my Mom was a single mother working two jobs, doing her best to provide for her three children. From this period I remember the few times we would get to eat fast-food, we would all share one drink. (Perhaps this is how I became germophobic!) Occasionally, my Dad would pick us up, but it was never consistent: some holidays, some birthdays, and sporadic weekends. Memories remain of having to peel us off his legs as we all cried when he dropped us off.
Tapping into My Two Passions: Basketball and Words (1993-2000)
Less than five years later in 1993, my Mom moved us four blocks away to another house. However, this house was across the street from Laura Steele Elementary. In August of 1994, I remember one day as clear as any. Two of my friends from Ms. Acosta’s third grade class were playing at the school: Joe Anthony Diaz and Ramon Rivera. While I never played after school with them before, I decided to walk over to connect. My life forever changed as I fell in love with basketball. From that point on, basketball became my passion. I would record NBA games, memorize the dates of team championships, play basketball video games, play outside for hours upon hours; I joined club teams and traveled around Texas. Along with basketball came my love for music in hip-hop and R&B; Coolio, Montel Jordan, Puff Daddy, Bone Thugs-N-Harmony, Usher, Boyz II Men, Jay Z, Busta Rhymes, Ginuwine, Juvenile, Eminem, Dr. Dre, and B.G were among the most influential artists in my life. Memorizing their lyrics came second nature to me.
During this same time period, I began reading various Goosebumps books by R.L. Stine. He always kept me in constant suspense. After I finished reading each book, I would place it over the couch that I slept on, showing off as though these books were my trophies. Later, I began reading from his Fear Street series. One additional quirk during this phase was my insistence on watching movies with the closed caption words displayed. For some reason, I liked to read along with the words, instead of simply listening and watching.
By the time I was in eighth grade in 1999 into 2000, I enjoyed writing and reading my thoughts to others. Whenever the teacher gave a writing assignment and asked for someone to read what they wrote, I would volunteer to go first. During this year, I had my first real girlfriend. I began to write her poetry. She did me wrong, but for some odd reason – even though I ended it with her – I continued to write her poetry and read it to her.
One book that we were required to read during my eighth grade year was The Giver by Lois Lowry. As I read through the book, I would share what I learned with my Mom. My Mom is among the best at listening attentively and enthusiastically. She loves learning about life through her children’s eyes. We had such stimulating conversation that I bought the book for her. To my delight, as she read the book, our dialogue only grew deeper. Even today, we quote the book as we challenge each other with being more specific with our word choice: “Precision of language.” (When The Giver movie came out in 2014, I took my Mom on a date to see it.)
By the end of my eighth grade year, I received one of the most humbling and flattering awards: I was voted most likely to succeed among my peers. Other people were more talented, more intelligent, and better at connecting with people. Looking back, I cherish the vision that other people had for my life; I only hope to live up to their belief in me.
Potential Leader in First Job and High School Transformation After Darkness (2000-2004)
By the summer of 2000, I started my first job at McDonald’s. My older sister, Diamond, worked there and she helped me get the role. Even though I was only 14-years-old when I started, my age was overlooked. The leadership staff believed I was 16-years-old. In my nature, I aimed at efficiency in speed and effectiveness in connecting with my co-workers. One day, the general manager, Ray, asked me if I would want to be a manager. “How old do you have to be?” I asked. He replied, “Eighteen years old.” When I heard this, I responded: “Ah, I’m not old enough.” Ray said: “Well, when you are, you let me know.” Reflecting on this moment, I treasure the leadership potential Ray saw in me. Could I be a leader, responsible for the development and contribution of others?
In August of 2000, I started my Freshman year at Highlands High School. This is when I met Pedro Delgado, who I credit as being the person who most helped me transform my life. Of all the people I had interacted with up to this point, he was the first person who aimed for integrity, tact, and authenticity when he spoke. He stood out because he did not use vulgar language the way the rest of us on the basketball team did. With time, he explained his commitment to use language to build and benefit. Pedro made it known that he wanted to help me change my life for the better. During our junior year in the spring of 2003, he connected me with a few more guys who began investing in me, teaching me, and supporting me. However, I was only absorbing the information without implementing the principles.
During February of 2003, my Mom sat my brother and I down at my Grandma’s house. She explained that my Dad shot himself; he committed suicide. My life was turned upside down. As I processed his death, life became difficult for me to endure; I slept excessively, hoping to wake up to a different reality. Often, I slept through my first two classes, only arriving at school at lunch time. This resulted in me failing Spanish with a 40 and precalculus with a 17. I failed off the track team. Wrestling with my Dad’s death centered on wondering: Did he have joy, peace, and hope at the end of his life? I knew I may not ever get an answer to that question.
Leading into my Senior year in August of 2003, I was tired of my pain and exhausted by the consequences of my poor choices. While I knew I could not answer the question about my Dad’s joy, peace, and hope, I could make decisions that cultivated joy, peace, and hope in myself and those around me. On August 24th of 2003, I committed to implementing every valuable principle I discovered. From this point on, I mentored and coached my peers and other underclassmen. Despite the poor grades from the end of my junior year, my grade point average enabled me to be inducted into the National Honor Society. Setting aside time to devote to memorizing uplifting content became a regular part of my life during this period. In fact, I bought my first personal growth book: “How to Be Like Mike” by Pat Williams. As the spring of 2004 came to a finish, I was asked to give my first speech to a group of high school students. Truly not knowing what I was getting into, I accepted. Personally, I figured I would base my speech on principles I learned from “How to Be Like Mike”, helping people with attitude, perspective, and personal discipline. My speech was not a hit; I was unorganized and disheveled in presenting. But people took note of my passion as one attendee asked if I would pursue a career with public speaking. Up to that point in my life, I never considered that as a possibility.
Two additional events took place in my Senior year that emphasized my calling as a writer. After I wrote a paper in my English class about people working in dead-end careers just as hamsters run on an exercise wheel going nowhere, my teacher – Mr. Voelker – told me I had an outstanding gift in writing. Further, he explained that I wrote in a rare way of conveying raw truths with vivid illustrations. Another life altering event took place in my AVID (Advancement Via Individual Determination) class in high school. My teacher asked me to write an essay about overcoming a hardship for a scholarship. I worked on it for an hour and submitted the essay with the application. To my shock and delight, I was awarded a $20,000 scholarship! My paper elaborated on overcoming my Dad’s death, sharing how I was striving to be transformed because of it.
University Life with Phenomenal Mentors and Inspiration for Reading (2004-2009)
In June of 2004, I graduated from Highlands High School. From 2004 to 2009, I attended the University of Tampa, the University of Texas at San Antonio, San Antonio College, and St. Phillip’s College. My initial efforts in college were unsuccessful, failing and dropping classes constantly. Understanding my unique manner of learning and processing information came years later. Despite my early struggles academically, great men came into my life and invested deeply in my development. I, in turn, looked to be an uplifting influence on my peers as a mentor. During this time, I learned to facilitate small group discussions focused on personal growth, leadership, attitude, and relationships. In addition, I was given opportunities to speak to a couple of hundred people about perseverance, humility, and serving others. Looking back, I realize my talent of speaking was blossoming but my character with academic performance was sorely lacking.
One of my mentors from 2006-2008 was Jeff Henderson. As an avid reader himself, he referred me to incredible authors and life-altering books. I remember three of his top ten books he endorsed were The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership, The 21 Indispensable Qualities of a Leader, and Winning with People. Each of these books are written by John Maxwell, who became my favorite all-time author. His books and teachings have shaped me and molded me.
Each time I was in a romantic relationship during this time period, it never seemed to work. I did not understand what was going wrong. This inspired a deep appreciation for reading books focused on women and other books on romantic relationships. With time, I came to cling to Gary Chapman’s The Five Love Languages, John Gray’s Men Are From Mars Women Are From Venus, Robin Weidner’s Secure in Heart, Emerson Eggerich’s Love & Respect, John and Stasi Eldridge’s Captivating, Richard and Kristine Carlson’s Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff in Love, and more. I figured if I could understand more and implement more from my reading, I could improve and be better equipped in my next relationship.
Restaurant Manager, Janitor, Entrepreneur, and Introduced to Nationwide (2009-2011)
By the year 2009, I was working as a server in a restaurant while attending college. To my surprise, I was promoted to the restaurant manager. While the owner may have seen leadership potential in me, I may have simply been one of the few who could fulfill the role at the time. Either way, it was a phenomenal opportunity to learn the nuances of leading in the restaurant business.
Later in the summer of 2009, I worked as a janitor for a park in downtown San Antonio. This gave me exposure to the poor and homeless who reside in the inner city. I reasoned if I could learn contentment in cleaning bathrooms, I could be content anywhere doing anything.
Once 2010 began, I was not enrolled in school because of a mix up with the paperwork at UTSA. I decided to begin ventures as an entrepreneur. Following in the footsteps of my Mom, I tried a landscaping business, a moving business, a dance business, and real estate. Each experience brought new life lessons to me. Each endeavor was providing a service to my clientele. For those with property, my landscaping provided the service of enhancing the aesthetics of their grass, trees, plants, and flowers; for those transitioning from one location to another, my moving business provided the service of muscle and careful transportation; for those looking to connect with others, my dance instructing business provided a service to help others learn how to enjoy social scenes with music; for those looking to become a homeowner, my real estate business provided a service to lay down roots for their family.
In the fall of 2011, I started an insurance career at Nationwide. This was my first office job, where I had a set 40-hours a week for work. After being an entrepreneur, it was refreshing to learn about benefits, paid time off, and retirement contributions. My role was in customer service which allowed me to use the skills I had developed prior to Nationwide.
Prison Volunteer, Angelita Pierce, and StrengthFinders (2011-2013)
Early in 2011, I was actively involved as a volunteer mentor in the juvenile detention center here in San Antonio. For an hour each week, I would enter the facility and spend time with young men who wanted to engage in conversation about transformation and relationships. Going weekly to this facility, I learned of the high-turnover rate among the young men; rarely would I see the same guys week-after-week. This spurred me to transition my community focus to the Torres Unit, which is a state prison for men in Hondo, Tx. After orientation, I spoke with the chaplain at the unit, who opened an opportunity for me to speak about leadership to the convicts. My time volunteering in this prison was especially rewarding because I saw the same group of guys week-after-week, truly establishing depth with one another. While my role was to speak to motivate and provide principles to help these men with their relationships, teamwork, attitude, and personal growth, the men at this facility inspired me and called me higher repeatedly.
In February of 2011, I asked Angelita Pierce if she would be my girlfriend. She said yes! Without question, people who know us affirm that she complements me and builds me up in every way. I could not ask for a better person to walk with me, sharing life. Every area of life that I am weak, she is strong. Her character is unshakeable and her beauty is undeniable. No doubt – I am one blessed guy. Our wedding was in June of 2013.
Back at Nationwide, my supervisor bought me a life-changing book titled StrengthFinders 2.0. I learned that my top five strengths were (and are) communication, positivity, focusing, achieving, and maximizing. The fundamental concept of the book affirms: In order to maximize your life and contribution, you need to stay in your strengths. While I may have been vaguely aware of my strengths prior, my whole life made sense after the assessment. My passion for reading, speaking, and teaching contributed to my gift in communication; my Mom’s positive attitude principles nourished optimism in me from infancy; and the other three gifts were also seen plainly in my life.
During the fall of 2013, I spoke for the first time at a conference on the topic of romantic relationships. After years of reading, discussing, and implementing relationship principles, the content was easily attained; I simply laced the principles with vulnerable personal anecdotes. It was a blast!
Corporate Leader, Corporate Speaker, Corporate Coach, Motivational Speaker, and Marriage Investment (2014-2018)
At Nationwide, I began volunteering for every opportunity to speak. Also, I joined the Diversity and Inclusion Council. Every time a class of new hires needed a presentation about Diversity and Inclusion, I offered to go. When my leader organized a team meeting, I offered to present and engage the team with principles for fostering greater team engagement. This led to being certified as a Continuous Improvement Coach.
In May of 2014, I was promoted to a leadership position at Nationwide. This role opened up more opportunities to speak. Another business unit requested I design and deliver an hour-long workshop on building relationships and networking for their leadership development program. For the following two years (2015-2016), they invited me back to deliver the workshop. When new hire classes would graduate from training, I would tell the leadership team that I would always be ready to speak an inspirational thought to them. These speeches I wrote and delivered were 10-15 minutes long and centered on humility, learning, integrity, helping each other, and vision. In the leadership development program in my business unit, I was asked to enhance and deliver workshops on engagement, interpersonal communication, and dynamic presentations. My favorite invitation I received in the corporate arena was from the Women’s Professional Development Group on campus. Graciously, they invited me to speak on mindfulness, peace, and confidence. We had an amazing time with incredible audience engagement.
As a leader at Nationwide, I had the fundamental expectation of coaching between 15-25 insurance professionals every week. Seeing these individuals excel in their performance and attain promotions was deeply rewarding. Unlocking potential in others became a foundational pillar of who I am and what I aim for in all of my relationships. Liberty University had a degree program that grabbed my attention; it was a psychology degree with a specialty in success coaching. By 2015, I completed the final courses to graduate with honors for a Bachelor’s Degree of Science in Psychology. It took me longer than most of my peers, but I persevered.
Outside of Nationwide, people generously extended opportunities for me to engage and encourage through motivational speaking. In 2014, I spoke to orphans from Central America about personal growth and perseverance. In the summer of 2014, I was invited to be the keynote speaker at a graduation in prison in front of 200 inmates; I spoke about shining from wherever you are. In 2016, I spoke about relationships between men and women in Austin, TX. In 2017, I officiated a wedding for the first time for my friends – Steve and Steph. I didn’t know this would ever be something I could even do. In the summer of 2018, I spoke for the second time at a funeral. In the fall of 2018, I officiated another wedding ceremony. Also in the fall of 2018, I spoke for the first time nationally in Tulsa, OK about attitude.
In the early part of 2014, Lita and I began attending yearly marriage enrichment weekend workshops to intentionally invest in our marriage. By the year 2017, we began attending two marriage enrichment weekend workshops a year to learn and grow. As we invested in our own marriage, opportunities to build up and invest in other marriages surfaced. We have facilitated pre-marital coaching for multiple couples since 2015.
Spiritual Content, Goodbye Nationwide, Strong Life Coach Begins! (2018-present)
During the early part of 2018, I offered to design and deliver a 5-part series of spiritual relationship content to the children’s teachers for a local church. The coordinators of the children’s program readily agreed. Because the children’s teachers do a 4-month rotation of volunteering, I delivered 15 speeches a year covering the content. After doing this four full rotations, I created more material for personal devotions.
In November of 2018, I was informed that my role at Nationwide would be eliminated. While there was a temptation to overanalyze the nuances of the decision, I knew for years that I wanted to start a motivational speaking and coaching business. This seemed like the perfect opportunity to segue into the new venture. My wife and I prayed, sought advice, and ultimately understood that I had been preparing to do speaking and coaching full time for a decade and a half. Similarly, I believe the gift of writing was revealed to me back in eighth grade with poetry and school assignments. I had no doubt that I am an author who simply hasn’t published books yet. On March 14th of 2019, I worked my last day with Nationwide. No doubt – Nationwide was abundantly good to me. I learned and gained invaluable experience during my time with the organization.
Strong Life Coach launched on March 15th, 2019! I am simply responding to my life’s calling. For my entire journey, I have been preparing to be a speaker, coach, writer, and consultant. In the first four months, I have delivered motivational speeches to elementary students, middle school students, high school students and their families, professionals, organizations, and churches. In addition, I’ve launched a Podcast aimed at elevating people in their lives. And it’s only the beginning so stay tuned!
